Volver

Car accident recovery is not going well. Two weeks ago my sciatica suddenly reappeared, and I can't figure out why (other than the blatently obvious reason) or how to quell it. To me, sciatica represents everything I've tried to defeat in the past couple of years, and having that symptom back is depressing in the extreme.

This is my first major regression. Prior to the car accident, I was almost better. I was literally almost better. I had just started thinking about plane rides and road trips and everything else I didn't let myself think about during my time in bed. An inability to follow through on a dream highlights the fact that I'm an invalid, and I've actively resisted making any plans at all while I've been in bed. Now, that dam has burst, and the resulting letdown is almost more discouraging than the symptoms themselves.

I don't know how many more hurdles I will have to jump before I'll actually get to jump. I'm really really sick of everything going wrong.

photo credit: http://blogs.lib.uwaterloo.ca/librarian4math/files/2009/06/frustration.jpg